im drinking this country out of the recession.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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