i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
