Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Randomize
