sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
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