I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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