Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
