if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
