Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
