It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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