big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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