A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
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