u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
