She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Randomize
