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  "The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"

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• This is either an excerpt from a police report or a romance novel.

  Submitted by mazerati on Jul 15, 11 at 4:25pm

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• Now the juvenile gets to get tried as an adult

  Submitted by Phys on Jul 15, 11 at 4:52pm

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• Proceeded* grammar police.

  Submitted by protectoroftext on Jul 15, 11 at 5:59pm

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• Bull shit

  Submitted by unicornpoop on Jul 16, 11 at 8:04pm

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• Matches, that's old school.

  Submitted by nonphotoblue on Jul 15, 11 at 4:14pm

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  • If I smoked, I would totally use matches. And I'd practice lighting them in front of a mirror so I could pull off that whole 1950s newspaper reporter thing.

    Submitted by jltc on Jul 15, 11 at 4:43pm

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• Is this some sort of bizarre Mad Libs?

  Submitted by thatgirlsarah on Jul 16, 11 at 12:52am

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• between his legs? or lips?

  Submitted by nursesdoitbetter on Jul 16, 11 at 12:12pm

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• Then what happened? Tell me a story..

  Submitted by appocolypse77 on Jul 15, 11 at 6:55pm

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• Report-writing is such a vital skill for law enforcement professionals....

  Submitted by motorteeth on Jul 16, 11 at 6:54am

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• WINN (:

  Submitted by breezyyb08 on Jul 15, 11 at 8:31pm

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