I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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