i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
no. you can't hotbox the world.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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