My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
This is classic penis vs brain.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Randomize