Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
All I want is dick and wine.
Randomize
