Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Randomize