haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
