p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize
