I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
