i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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