Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
