When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize
