I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Randomize
