My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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