piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Randomize
