How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize