You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
