My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
it's like heaven, but drunker
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
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