: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
