She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
