At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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