do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Randomize
