At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
