Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize