this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Randomize