Dude! wtf happend last nite? I woke up with 2 black eyes and a head ache
You stepped off the curb and face planted the road...twice
Why didnt you hold me up....and why a second time?
I helped you up but figured it was wayy funnier to watch you fall again then lose my buzz....
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Randomize
