Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
