R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
