Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
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