your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
