dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize
