pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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