so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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