Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
