do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
