I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
