im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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