I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
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